I like questions and ideas that help me be “have a sober estimate” of myself, like Romans 12:3 tells us to do. If you are a Christian mom, here are some questions you can consider, to help discern if you are being sober-minded and reasonable in your thoughts, words, and choices.
Essentially, they all stem from this:
If everyone ____(insert thought/words/actions)_______ like I do, would it be positive or negative?
Here are some ways I consider it, in my own life:
If everyone in my church served as frequently and enthusiastically as I do, would the church be overflowing with joyful servants?
If everyone in my church heeded the words of the pastor(s) and elders like I do, would they be happy to serve and lead this congregation?
If everyone treated the pastors the way I do (offering the same measure of grace, or the same frequency of criticism), would the church be thriving or withering?
If everyone in my church used their gifts to bless, encourage, rebuke, and pray for one another the way that I do, would there be a thriving, inter-dependent, maturing church?
If every Christian read their Bibles and spent time in prayer similar to my patterns, would we have a growing Body of believers, or a bunch of withering, weak Christians?
ON SOCIAL MEDIA:
If everyone on social media posted as often as I do, would it be beneficial and contribute to the social good, or noisy and annoying?
If everyone spent as much time as I do on social media, would it be profitable for them, their marriages, their kids, and engagement in church and community?
If everyone complained (or bragged) on social media as often and specifically as I do, would that be a good or bad thing?
If every mom smiled and interacted kindly with her children as often as I do with mine, would the world’s children be treated kindly or rudely?
If everyone let their kids act this way, would it be a blessing or annoying to be around children?
If every child was disciplined with the same consistency that I give to my child, would the world’s children be respectful and obedient or sneaky and convinced their parents don’t mean what they say?
If everyone treated this issue the way I do, would it be beneficial or harmful? (i.e., if everyone handled pushing/bullying the way I do…, if everyone let their kids hear their mom talk like this…, if everyone handled teaching their kids about sex and private parts the way I do…)
If everyone’s sons were raised with the self-discipline, work ethic, and worldview I’m giving to my sons, would future wives of the world be thankful?
If every parent supervised their children to the degree that I do, would it be harmful or beneficial for children?
If every child was prepared for life in this current world/ year/ situation/ economy, the way mine are, would they be able to successfully step into adult life, or would they flounder?
If every child had this much screen time, would it be beneficial or harmful for their brains, and for society?
If every child was raised with the knowledge of God that my children have, and with the daily experience of living with me that my children experience, would churches be stronger in 20 years, or weaker?
If every wife talked to her husband this way, would it be good or bad for marriages?
If every wife was this restrictive and unapproachable, or this kind-hearted and affectionate, with her sexual love with her husband, would it be good or bad for marriages?
If every wife gave this level of attention and care to her husband, would it be more likely to harm or grow their marriage?
If every wife helped her husband as discerningly and purposefully as me, would husbands everywhere be benefitting or struggling?
While it’s not some kind of absolute law, when I consider my own behavior/choices, and ask these sorts of questions, it brings clarity about whether or not a particular action is ultimately FOR THE GOOD.
IN THE COMMENTS: Do you ever ask yourself these kinds of questions? Feel free to share more examples to get us all thinking.
3 thoughts on ““If Every…” (a Self-Assessment for Christian Moms)”
Thank you for sharing this means of self-assessment! I have followed your blog for years…. Since my children are mostly out of the nest (studying in Bible school nearby) I have been motivated to adapt this to my current volunteer position, working in the office of the same Bible school. Questions along the lines of “If every student/colleague were treated……like I do,” would he/she be built up….. or feel unworthy of my time/attention……..?” THis is a useful tool for anyone in any relationship.
Yes. It’s a spin-off from Immanuel Kant’s categorical imperative.
“In other words, ‘what sort of place would the world be if everyone acted in the way I am considering acting?'”
More on that here: https://ethics.theamericancollege.edu/library/news/everyday-ethics-–-what-if-everybody-did
So convicting – thank you, Jess!